Avengers Assemble and the Rage of a Once Bullied Nerd

Let me begin this week’s post with an excerpt from “douche bag of the year” Jordan Burchette over at Men’s Fitness Magazine and his article about Comic-Con.

              

       “This year, attendees all appear to have colluded in advance to imagine the most popular heroes and villains of comics, movies and anime as doughy, sickly, weak, infirm or, in the most impressive examples, morbidly obese.  What we observed was a testament to the imagination and resourcefulness of the comic book fan, a live “What if?” comic, if you will, contemplating how our heroes would look close to death.”

                Now, I know what you’re thinking: “My god man, ease up on the comma usage.”  To which I would have to agree but the content is really what I’m pointing out here.  I’ll admit, though, this is a bit tame and doesn’t necessarily warrant a rage-filled tirade; for that, I give you this excerpt from Mr. Burchette in an article he wrote for Maxim a little while back.

                “For those of you not currently attending high school or working in NASA office services, and lack access to persecutable nerds on a daily basis, the comic book industry stages regional conventions where you can see all the fat versions of your favorite fictional characters.  New York Comic Con was no exception, showcasing only the most ample of future college campus gunmen flossing their muffin-topped costumes like pimps at a player’s ball.  There was Fat Colossus, Awkward-Fitting Cobra Commander, and Dumpy Slave Leia among countless others, all united under the banner of involuntary celibacy.  We would have vigorously applied wedgies, noogies, and whirly bowls to these socially-mutated permavirgins, but our Master Chief armor was far too restrictive.”

                So again you’re probably thinking his love of commas, especially the oxford variety, is a bit overwhelming; but again I have to say pay attention to his meat-headed content.   It’s this sort of ignorant, hate fueled and moronic talk that makes me wonder if humanity really is worth saving.  If you’re any kind of lifelong nerd like I am, you’ve been dealing with idiots like this for as long as you can remember.  When we all grow up and become adults in the real world we expect to not be bothered by this kind of childish and immature behavior.  It appears some “adults” don’t ever mentally grow beyond 15 years old.  It’s such an amazing example of stereotype; a magazine known for having ripped and attractive men on the cover making fun of the out of shape or socially awkward crowd.  This guy calls himself a professional journalist for crying out loud!

Comic Con, or any other convention like it for that matter, are meant to be places where the nerds and geeks can come and gather.  Where we can enjoy, and be surrounded by, the things we love without fear of bullying or judgement by the likes of Mr. Burchette.  Even though we think the world at large is populated by mature and reasonable adults we are far from wrong when a convention comes to town and the “normies” point and laugh at the “weirdos” who are dressed up.  I’ve talked before how everyone is a geek or nerd in some way but I’m afraid it’s a lot like homophobia.  Many psychologists believe that extreme homophobia is a way for the psyche to cope with latent homosexuality; you’ll never admit you’re gay or that you like the company of men so you’ll lash out and deny it, afraid of what others might say if they knew the truth.  Sure, it’s an extreme analogy, but it’s not far off; look at the last sentence of the second excerpt.  He’s not only wearing a costume that hides his identity he’s also saying how he’d bully others in the same situation while wearing said costume.  I’m also going to assume he’d run to the nearest secluded space afterwards and cry like a baby in shame; while downing a Twinkie or two for comfort.

Since the Men's Fitness article has posted, the internet has rallied in a style not much different than that of The Justice League or The Avengers.  There’s a Facebook page along with countless well known nerdy and geeky bloggers crying for this man’s head.  Many have even taken to Twitter and attacked his feed (@JordanBurchette if you’d like to join in).  The public outcry has been so daunting that Men’s Fitness has finally taken the article down; a small victory for the geeky crowd but we would really still like an apology.  We’ll see if that ever happens though, he seems to be playing the typical “You’re taking me too seriously” card.  I’d be happy just seeing him lit on fire and reduced to blackened ash in a public square…is that too much to ask?

My point in all this is to encourage everyone to not judge someone else based on what they like, who they like, what they look like, how they sound, what they wear or what they find amusing in a hobby.  I know it’s hard, I’ve been known to do it as I’m sure everyone reading this has; but if you must judge, keep it to yourself.  Don’t go out of your way to hurt someone else's feelings because that’s just mean and as a so called “intelligent” race/society, we should be above such things.  If we don’t rise above such petty trivialities then I’ll be joining the great Professor Hubert Farnsworth in not wanting to live on this planet anymore.

Till next time fellow nerdlings. BE PROUD! SO SAY WE ALL!